Monday, February 26, 2007

At Work, the Mall, the Streets & Demonic Attacks

Friday (2-23-07) I felt led to say during a meeting at work that Jesus Christ helped me get through some hard times, and that now he is my life and I am fully satisfied in him.

Evangelism is scary to me, so God has been moving me towards it. Last week at my building church and at my simple church I promoted going to the mall on Friday to evangelise. Building church people were interested but busy, sick, scared, or out of town. Maybe next time for them. 9 out of the 14 people from my simple church showed up even though they had further to travel. We split into three teams: three women, two men, and two men and a baby girl. John came later because of traffic. The women talked to a few people, ending up sharing about God to a few people and the Gospel with one Hindu woman that was too scared to talk about what she thought about what happens after death.
The two guys ended up talking to one guy the whole time. He was a believer but not a Jesus follower.
I was with Willie and his daughter (carried in a harness on his chest). He spoke to three Spanish speaking janitors. Two of them jetted when he said something about walking in the spirit. After Willie talked to her for a while, I ended up praying for the one that stayed. Willie translated. She was a christian but had no bible, no church, was lonely and had a sick family member she can't contact. I invited her to my building church which is close to the mall. I didn't offer to give her a ride because I usually show up very late. I wanted to help her get a ride there or somewhere. I will try to see her again with someone willing to help. Much later I bought her a bible but I will have to look for her again. Preston telephoned Willie to come back to talk with the guy he was talking with. That guy opened up about his problems to Willie.
After that guy left we all hung out together as the mall was closing. A good friend from another state called. I had been wanting him to talk to Willie. Willie has dealt with a similar problem that my friend has.
I did not initiate any conversations the whole time, which the accuser used to attacked me.

I was attacked by the devil in different ways. The first was fear and guilt for not evangelising. Also, the mall was full of women without enough covering. I could have gotten whiplash from looking away from all the blatant displays of cleavage. Temptation was all around me but I did not look or dwell or sin. Saturday morning I had a sexual dream. I woke up to disappointment in my non-performance as an evangelizer as well as lust for what was in the dream. I was hit again while with the homeless church because I saw someone on one of the library computers watching a porn movie. I did not look away very fast and I looked again. The last few months I have been advocating being single; but after what I saw on that computer monitor, I instantaneously changed my mind and decided to get married. I was in the flesh for sure. I started acting silly around the guys (a fruit of the flesh for me). One interesting point to note is that I skipped my regular time alone with God on Friday (lunch time) to have lunch with friends to discuss the mall thing. Community is necessary but simple solitary undistracted communion with Jesus is also necessary. Also on the street, I was sad for a woman that put her trust in herself instead of Jesus. She wanted to get off the streets or just hang out with us somewhere. It made me very sad; I wondered if I we could have hung out with her more but I was ready to go. We had been there from 1-9pm. I also felt like a friend of mine neither liked me nor thought I was very useful. I was also attacked on Friday by a gossip report that I should not have participated in regarding blindly spoken, fourth hand information concerning a woman-friend of mine that supposedly thought I was leading her on. It may be true because I sometimes flirt; its an old habit I need to kill. I also think I am doing poorly at work.

Andrea, Nate, and Kelly called me on Sunday, which made me feel like I actually have friends. Kelly came by. Then Nate came over to help me on my house. It was huge that he came over to my house to be my friend because I have been deeply yearning for some close man-friends ever since I got out of the navy.
The men's meeting at my house also helped me, especially when Preston prayed for dependence on God for me and then Willie prayed for me not grow weary of serving the LORD. After they left I called the out of state friend. I told him about the attacks. He said it had been happening to him too. God used it for good.

Street church notes: At the Resource Center we met new people as well as saw people we knew. Kelly was talking to allot of the women including the woman who trusted herself not Jesus. Kelly brought her to us. George was flowing with the Spirit while talking to her. He gently and boldly shared the full gospel as it came up. They really seem to appreciate us hanging out with them for so long. Joe Jackson gave me a hug and someone I don't know gave me a hug from the back and said something like, "I love you man."


Alan Knox said...


Thank you for sharing this testimony. It takes a lot of courage to admit the temptations and sins in your life. I pray that God will continue to surround you with men who will help you walk through these times of temptation. Keep seeking him, and let him sanctify you.


Anonymous said...

You're confessional lifestyle is an encouragement to is also encouraging that you are recognizing the attacks and temptations of the enemy and dragging sin into the light. Wow!